About That Gap On Your Resume


When you’ve been out of work for some time, one of your concerns is going to be that large gap on your résumé. And why is that a concern? Primarily because you know it’s going to be a concern for the people who are going to be mulling over hiring you versus those you’re competing with.

You should expect some questions which ask you to share what you’ve done with yourself during the present gap. Now there are many things you could say in reply, but one of the poorest things would be to shrug your shoulders and say, “Not much really.” That kind of response isn’t going to impress anyone, let alone someone considering hiring you. The thing is though, what if that’s the truth?

Well, you certainly can’t change what’s happened in the past; after all it’s called the past for a reason. You can however, do something in the present which will allow you to improve your answer in your future interviews. So rather than feeling bad about having not done much, feel better about choosing to do something now.

What can you do aside from get a job to fill in gaps on your résumé you ask? Excellent question and I’m so glad you asked!

Volunteer your time. Donating your time to support a cause can be immensely beneficial in a number of ways. For starters, yes you get to fill in the gap on your résumé with a new experience. From your first shift wherever it is you give of yourself, you’ll be establishing a relationship with someone in charge of supervising you and that person is your future reference possibly. But there’s more… You’ll feel good. Suddenly you have purpose again; you’ll feel appreciated and valued when you show up. You’ll also be practicing skills that may have otherwise started to rust, such as customer service if you work with the public, communication skills, teamwork skills and you’re going to find you enjoy being productive.

Upgrade your education. Whether it’s going back to finish your grade 12 or that one course that would complete your College Diploma or University Degree, now might be a great time to invest in yourself and complete what you started years ago. No, it’s not a waste of time, nor is it too expensive to consider doing while you’re out of work. It might just be a spark that changes your future and ignites some passion into your soul where you thought the fire had long been extinguished. You’ll have a reason to get up and get out, charge your little brain cells in ways that have been dormant, and you’ll finish off with a great sense of accomplishment. Day school or night school, full-time or part-time, online or in-class, there’s so many options!

Get healthy. I know! I know! Being out of work you’ve developed some unsavory habits and that lethargy has made you feel overly tired, the muscle tone you had once upon a time has disappeared and perhaps your weight has changed more or less; literally speaking. In short, you might not feel as good about your health or appearance as you used to. Okay, but again, stop beating yourself up about the choices you made in the past and resolve to make some better ones now. Go for walks and turn those walks into walks and short jogs. Turn those short jogs into longer ones or even a run or two. Eat better and healthier; don’t buy at the grocery store what you’ll feel bad about eating if it shows up in the pantry or fridge at home. See the Doctor and Dentist now and address the things which will help you ultimately feel better and present yourself better to others.

Pick up part-time work. Choosing to look for a part-time job and one outside your field doesn’t have to be an admission of failure. In fact, picking up a part-time job can have immense benefits. First of all it does fill the gap on the résumé with something. You can make the case to a future employer that you filled the gap with a job to stabilize your finances but you’re applying for whatever the job is you’re interviewing for because you want to get back into your field of training and experience. That part-time job will get you back into a routine gradually if you’re not up to a full-time job and being accountable every day.

Now the other thing you can do is some self-assessment. There’s free stuff online if you want to search personality assessments, Multiple Intelligences or Career Exploration. You can also enlist an Employment Coach or Counsellor, drop into a College or University Guidance office and get help with your career direction. If your issue is figuring out what to actually do in life, how are you going to do it going about it the way you’ve been going about it? Right! Time for a change in strategy.

Your cover letter when applying for work is a great place to explain the gap in your résumé. When you do get interviews, you already know that they must be understanding of your gap or you wouldn’t be invited in for the interview. This can increase your confidence in addressing what otherwise would be a frustrating and embarrassing question to answer.

Lots of options to consider and with 2019 days away, now is the time to act.

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Out Of Work? Get Your Team Together


I think it’s a behaviour common to many people; when we’re embarrassed, ashamed or we feel we don’t quite measure up in some way, we do our best to isolate ourselves and keep the source of our embarrassment to ourselves. After all, the fewer people who see us in these moments, the less likely we’ll feel exposed and we hope to reintegrate ourselves back into our circle of friends and family when we’ve recovered.

Being out of work can feel very much like this scenario. Lose your job and you might tell a few of your closest supporters, adding, “Please don’t tell anyone. I don’t want everyone to know.”

The irony of this behaviour is that we often miss opportunities because the very people who could tell us about job openings are kept unaware that we’re looking for a job. As you’re unaware that they know there’s a job opening, you don’t even know what you’re missing; but you’ve missed it all the same.

It’s our ego though that needs protecting; and I don’t mean this is in a self-centered kind of way. Protecting our ego, how we view and see ourselves, is a natural response. The fewer people who know about our unemployment the better; and if they want to assume we are still employed but on some vacation or leave, that’s fine. We’d rather they don’t even know we’re off in the first place. And this is the problem. We don’t want to have to explain why we’re not at work, so what we often do is stay inside our apartments, condo’s and houses; going out only to gather food and necessities.

Like I said, this behaviour is natural and instinctive. So having stated this, let me suggest you consider doing something which on the surface goes against your natural instincts; get your support team together.

Your support team isn’t just made up of Employment Coaches and Resume Writers. It isn’t made up exclusively by your spouse or your best friend either. No, your support team is composed of people you can trust to help you out while you look to regain employment. Just like many other teams you’ll be apart of in life in your personal and professional life, team members have specific roles.

Here’s some of the people you might want to enlist to be a part of your team:

  1. You

You’ll need to be the CEO or lead of your job search team. As you’re going to be recruiting people to help you out, you’ll need to prove that you’re seriously invested in this project. It will mean reaching out to people, getting them on board, checking in with them to make sure they stay committed – and they’ll work more for you if they see you working hardest for yourself. You need to be accountable therefore; show up for meetings, do your homework and work hard at finding work.

2. Emotional Supporters

Before we get to the technical helpers, you need people who will empathize with you, care for your well-being and understand the highs and lows of the job search. You’re going to have bad days precisely because you’re human. Emotional Supporters are those who get that and love you anyway. These folks pick you up and pick up the tab here and there when there is one. They keep you included in get-togethers and find the ‘free stuff’ to do is important to staying connected.

3. Technical Support

You’d be well-advised to have some expertise on your team when it comes to resume writing, employer and employment research. A good proofreader, a sounding board or Employment Coach to offer the critique you need but in a supportive and understanding approach. Whoever you have in this area might be your mock interviewer, helping you find and keep the confidence to do your best in those up and coming interviews.

4. Partners and Family

Obviously if you’re single and have no family you can pass on this one. However, when you have a partner, your spouse, boy/girl friend, etc. is critical to providing you with the stability you need when the assurance and identity a job brings is missing. Sure you might not want to, ‘burden’ them with your news and hold out telling them above all others, but your partner is a partner for a reason. It’s not your job that they value most – it’s you. If you want to deepen your relationship, trust them when you’re at a low point with being out of work. This is when partnerships often work best; you pick each other up and move forward together.

As for the family? Sure you might not want to tell mom or dad to protect them from worrying and protect yourself from all the dramatics of their concern; but that concern is genuine. You might end up with a few lasagna dinners being dropped off or depending on their status, a job lead to follow-up. Some moms and dads are really good at stepping up even when their kids are in their 40’s!

Now there are others too, but I leave it to you to decide who you need on your job search team. Essentially what I’m saying is go the counter-intuitive way and reach out to people instead of shutting out people. Take care of your physical and mental health while you find yourself out of work. This unemployment won’t last forever and will pass.

Fresh Starts Happen When You Want Them


Okay so the calendar today reads December 10 and New Year’s Day is still a few weeks away. Typically the days leading up to a flip in the calendar are when most people think of making some major changes and starting fresh. Be it losing weight, changing a bad habit, getting a job, or any number of other goals, January 1st seems to be a day when the majority set out to put their new behaviours into action.

However, when you think about making some changes, think about that line, “there’s no better time than the present.” I suppose the reason that right now is the best time is simply because it’s now that you’re thinking of whatever you want to change so take the opportunity to get on that change while you see the value in going after your goal. If you put off making that decision until some point in the future, you might not feel the same compulsion later. So what are to do? Wait another year until another January 1 comes along?

As for needing some external stimulus for change – like flipping the calendar to a new year, there’s plenty of those moments. For starters, we all flip the calendar 12 times a year; that’s 12 times we could opt to start some new behaviour. There’s your birthday too, although that comes around once a year, you might just be motivated to change things up on this anniversary of your birth.

The thing about your birthday is that it’s very much like New Year’s Day in that it only comes around once a year. If you’d like more opportunities, consider that there are 365 days in a year, and every day you wake up could be the sign to hit the reset button on something you want to give up or something you want to start.

Now suppose it’s a new job you’re after. Whether with the same employer you work with now or a new one, a new job might be just what you want. If you plan on getting hired January 1st, 2019, you can’t put off applying for jobs until December 31 can you? No, of course not. You’d actually need to be doing an active job search now; researching, job applications, resume and cover lettering writing, interviews and networking meetings. Even so, how many employer’s are even open on New Year’s day and of those who are, how many are training the new person on January 1? Not many.

Of course, you might be telling yourself that January 1st is when you’re planning on starting the job search. Nothing wrong with that goal. Of course, between now and January 1st you may be missing some good job postings, and it would be a shame if the job you’d really love has a deadline that you miss when you’re kicking back waiting for the calendar to roll over. The people you’re competing with will thank you for that one!

Let me give you a small piece of warning and advice if I may. When you make the decision to change your present behaviour and start to seriously job search, it’s going to be a challenge to first make the change in behaviour and then sustain that momentum you start. Your body and mind are going to rebel and in both cases because the status quo is easier.

So if you have a job already, the extra work you have to put in outside of work hours with a job search might come across at times as too much extra pressure and extra work. If you’re unemployed you won’t have that problem, but when you’re out of work, the habits you’ve developed – possibly sleeping in late, having a nap mid-afternoon, watching too much television or playing video games etc., might get in the way of sticking with the job of finding a job.

So be ready for the kick-back; that want to fight change and just go on with things the way they are. It might take some real perseverance and stamina to sustain change. What will help is keeping your mind focused on why you started the change in the first place. In other words, if your goal has enough meaning to you, it’s easier to stay focused on it because you want it bad enough to fight past the barriers that stand in your way.

It’s when you don’t want something enough to fully commit to it that you’re likely to fail. So in other words, if other people keep telling you to get a job and you grudgingly agree to start looking for one, the chances of success are lower as you’re more likely to revert to your old habits when no one is looking. When YOU want to work more than you don’t, that’s when your odds on succeeding will rise. It’s not just about getting a job by the way, the same is true of any goal we talk about; changing eating habits, learning to drive, being more polite, expressing more gratitude, taking up a new hobby. Whatever you’re contemplating, it will come about sooner if you commit to it.

Finally, if you’ve been after your goal in the past and not had success; so you haven’t got interviews or job offers, think about going about your job search in a different way. Trying a new strategy may get you different – and better results.

Career Planning Isn’t Mandatory


So here’s something that might surprise you; long-term career planning and mapping is NOT a mandatory requirement for career happiness and success. Well, that statement certainly flies in the face of the advice some very well-meaning professionals will give. And quite frankly, even the ones that acknowledge it isn’t absolutely mandatory will be wrong if they believe that only a small percentage of people reach career happiness without long-term planning.

Here’s why I believe the majority of people need not stress about the lack of some grand long-term plan.

First of all, when you’re in your teens and making choices about what courses to take in high school in order to eventually end up in college, university or a trade, you’re only basing these choices on the very limited exposure you’ve had in life to the world around you. You’re in your early teens and the people you’ve interacted with, the jobs you’ve acquired knowledge of are extremely confined to the ones you’re going to learn of in the next decade of your life. In other words, excepting some of course, it’s highly likely that with all the jobs that exist in the world – and will emerge in your future that don’t even exist in your teen years – the odds that what you want to do at 15 and 16 years of age will be what you’ll want to do until you’re 65 is very low.

In fact many high school graduates will take a year off before deciding what to do or what school to attend, simply to give themselves a year to make a better choice career-wise. Some will even do what they call a victory lap; another year of high school classes after graduating.

Further evidence are the people in first year university classes who take 5 very different subjects, just praying and hoping the light bulb goes on in that first year, and something grabs their interest. Maybe the first year classes include World Religions, Introduction to Philosophy, British Literature, Introduction to Sociology, and Introduction to Psychology. Oh by the way, these 5 were my own in year one. As it turns out, Sociology caught fire and so I loaded up with future courses to eventually graduate with a degree in Sociology.

In transitioning from a teen into a young adult, it is normal to expand your knowledge of various jobs and careers. As you start interacting independently with the world, responsible more often for things yourself, it only stands to reason that every so often some job catches your interest. Learning about the world around you and the people who live in it, many find themselves attracted to what others do. It follows naturally then that every so often you pause and think, “I could do that!”

Now of course we don’t act on every whim we get, but if we’re unsatisfied, curious, searching for something better or different, open to possibilities etc., we live consciously observing and then assessing pros and cons of various occupations. Sometimes we’ll also have conversations with folks in these jobs, asking them what they do, what skills and education it takes, how long they took to get started, the highs and lows, the good and the bad aspects of the work. Then we look and assess ourselves, what we both have and need if we wanted to head down some career path branching out from the path we’re on now.

This is normal by the way. To stay completely rigid, never varying from the path we imagined and set out on at 15 years old in this light seems the more peculiar. And yet, when we do decide to change our direction, for many it seems so hard to tell our parents, family and friends that we’ve had a change in what we want to do. Yes, we fear they’ll somehow think less of us; they’ll worry and think we’re indecisive and making an ill-informed choice. However, these family and friends haven’t been privy to the thoughts we’ve had – the deep, inner thoughts and feelings we’ve been experiencing for some time. It’s precisely these thoughts and feelings by the way that have acted as our guidance system. The more they cause us unease, the more we believe there has to be something else.

Even into our late 20’s and all the way into our 30’s and 40’s, it’s not uncommon for us to re-examine what it is we want to do with the rest of our lives. And why stop there? People in their 50’s and 60’s often take stock of where they are and what they want in their remaining working days often causing a job change.

When people near the end of their working life, it’s the norm – not the exception – that they’ll have amassed a varied career with several jobs and some career changes. Rather than meaning they fluttered from job to job aimlessly, it means they were wise enough to seize opportunities for change as they came along in life; and in the end they’ve had a diversified career. They may have in fact been very happy overall, where staying in one line of work may have caused them to feel trapped and less stimulated.

Now of course, one can be happy with one long-term career or several careers over a lifetime; even people with many jobs but no single career. Yes, you can win in the world of work any number of ways.

 

Self-Investment Comes At A Cost


When you’re completely invested in doing your best for the people you serve, you’re going to be tremendously effective. You’ll feel it each and every day too, because those who receive your help will know your assistance is coming from the heart. They’ll express their gratitude for your help, and you’ll begin to interact with each other in more meaningful ways.

But there’s a cost.

Pouring yourself into your work with such intensity means at the end of the day you’ll empty your tank. You’ll find yourself mentally exhausted because you were mentally engaged. Sometimes, you’ll be emotionally exhausted too, because working with people isn’t only a cerebral workout. Yes, when you’re dialed in, you’re emotionally, mentally and physically engaged. When you end each day asking yourself, “Is there anything else I could have done today to be of more help?”, you can’t help but get better at whatever it is you do.

Now if you look around you, you’ll see people who aren’t invested in the people they deal with. The signs are clearly evident. When the phone rings they hesitate before answering and decide whether they want to pick it up. 10 minutes before quitting time, they are packed up, coat on, computer shut down, and ready to head out the door. I’m betting you’re thinking of someone now who fits this description, because frankly, these types are everywhere, and they are often long-term employees too. Ironically, they aren’t in the same kind of danger as the best of the best, because they aren’t as emotionally and mentally engaged. Hence, they are protected from the emotional, physical and mental toll I’m talking about.

But there’s great news.

When you really get invested in doing your best for those you interact with and serve, something amazing happens to the size of your ‘tank’. The more you give, the bigger it gets! When you give of yourself, listening attentively to someone pour out their troubles, demonstrate compassion, empathy and provide supportive counsel, you not only benefit them, you benefit yourself. It’s like a hug quite frankly, you can’t give one without getting one.

So it follows then that the ones who are truly invested emotionally, physically and mentally in providing superior customer service are the ones that seemingly have this tremendous capacity which carries them well beyond what others see as their limits. If you’ve ever witnessed one of these people, you’ve likely thought, “Where does she get the energy?!”

The energy comes in the reciprocal emotional and mental investment the people being served return. They express their gratitude with sincerity and the small or great changes they make in their thoughts and actions provide evidence that they found your intervention meaningful and impactful. You’ve found a way to connect with them that others haven’t; you’ve touched them in ways that sent the message, “I genuinely care about you and the goals you’re working towards. I will help.”

And make no mistake it’s not, “I want to help”, it’s “I will help.” Oh it’s such a subtle change in words with a completely impactful and different message. Wanting to do something is not the same as doing something. Wanting to help isn’t the same as helping. And you know what? These people you serve and interact with are smart enough to hear the difference in your words from the words of others.

Now many who don’t do the work you do will often wonder if working with people all day long doesn’t actually bring you down. Hearing all these sad stories; all these problems they present with. It’s got to be troubling. Ah but you and I know differently. It’s precisely because people in dire circumstances turn to you first when they need an understanding and supportive ear that you are humbled by that trust. It is a privilege to do what you do and do it to the best of your ability.

This knowledge, this investment in the people we work with feeds our energy, allowing us to work with enthusiasm. And there are amazing people doing outstanding work everywhere. They’re in my workplace and in yours and right now you’re already calling people to mind who fit this description. There’s a cost of course, and it’s a fee the invested pay as they go about their day and are glad to have the opportunity.

There isn’t a job on the planet that doesn’t directly or indirectly impact on customers, clients, residents, end-users; call them what you will. When you ask someone who they work for, the best of the best never name an employer; that’s who they are employed by. The real invested ones work for those they serve. They recognize that their ‘customers’ are not just their end-users or consumers, but include their co-workers, their support staff, the people who benefit from the work that they do either lower or higher on the organizational chart.

The thing about the really good folks is that they do their work, they go about their day often in full knowledge that their peers don’t see all the extensive good work they do – and their okay with that. Their reward doesn’t come from formal recognition – although that’s always welcomed – the vitally important rewards come in small but sincere expressions of thanks and gratitude.

So carry on good people out there. You know who you are. And Dave, Mike, Vikki, Stephen, Dale, Gayle and Martin…well done.

Laid Off


The news has come out that 2,600 hourly employees and 300 contract and salaried employees are going to be laid off in 2019 by GM at their Oshawa plant in Durham Region Ontario.

This news isn’t good of course for those people and their immediate families. Nor is it welcomed news for the many businesses that both feed the GM plant with raw materials and supplies, and those who run businesses in the after sales markets. Think too of the impact on coffee trucks, safety shoe companies, clothing retailers, tire manufacturers etc. The ripple effect is going to go far beyond the 2,900 employees referenced as being directly laid off.

However, people are laid off on a daily basis not only in Oshawa, but in communities right around the globe. Just last week I had news of a friend being laid off in the coming year by a large Ontario hospital. You’d think that working for a large organization for 18 years would give a person a sense of security, but that’s just no longer the case.

There’s a lot of sympathy and empathy for those Oshawa GM employees. First of all, the number being laid off is a large one and it’s the finality of the decision; closing the entire plant for good – that’s making this story unique. However, a laid off employee is a laid off employee no matter where they work, no matter how many others are laid off with them. So imagine how a person must feel who is laid off but doesn’t get the press covering their impending departure; who doesn’t get the Province’s Premier announcing his government will do all it can to help out. That is something GM employees are getting that others are not.

Just as it shouldn’t be about who has a worse situation, those laid off by one employer or another, it shouldn’t stand to reason either that one employee gets more help to recover. Losing your income and finding yourself still having to meet your financial commitments is the same no matter which employer is laying you off. Stress, anxiety, fears, uncertainty; these are universally experienced.  When laid off for reasons beyond your control, you go through the same stages as others – shock at the news, anger, bargaining, acceptance and eventually moving on. There’s no timetable dictating how long you’ll spend in any one phase, and you might go back and forth too from one to another.

In the Oshawa GM case, it shocks and stings because this community has largely developed an identity as a community built on the automotive trade. Removing a key contributor in that industry robs the community at large of some of that identity. This happens all over the world where a major employer in a community pulls out and relocates somewhere new or shuts down altogether. Some towns have dried up in the past when this happened and only rusted buildings remain as a testament to what once was.

If there’s a silver lining in this – and I’ll accept that right now not a lot of people want to look for a silver lining – there’s reason to hope. Not hope for a reversal of GM’s decision as this doesn’t seem to be a ploy to get more government bail-outs or interest free loans. No, the positives lie elsewhere – potentially.

First of all, autoworkers have experienced lay-offs in the past. This is something many actually anticipate and to some degree plan for. This is different of course; the entire plant shut down for good. I get that. However, the industry shuts down lines every so often when producing a new vehicle, or having over production and so many won’t be laid off for the first time for reasons beyond their control. This previous experience with being laid off could potentially have instilled in many of those workers some resiliency; the ability to bounce back quicker than those in other industries who have no experience with ever having been laid off.

There’s an opportunity here too for competitors in the industry to bring onboard some of these highly skilled, dedicated and well-trained employees. They’ve got a stellar work attitude, up-to-date experience and they work with attention to detail making quality products. An employer might just look at these people and realize the potential benefit to their own business by holding a job fair or two.

The plant itself sits on some prime real estate in Durham Region. Not many companies need or can manage a facility the size of the GM property, but for those with vision, here’s a functioning, highly efficient and state-of-the-art facility for some other manufacturer to consider taking over. It could come with a well-trained and productive group of people at the ready too.

For some, the news will actually be the push they’ve needed to move on from the employer. It isn’t impossible to imagine that some of those affected might have considered other lines of work as people do in any business do from time-to-time. Perhaps for some, this was their wake-up call. A year of employment left and time to brush up the résumé, look for what’s next, and the real motivation to get serious and figure out some career change. Not all who get laid off have the luxury of a year of employment to do so.

Here’s to hoping those laid off here and elsewhere land on their feet.

Generally Speaking, Here’s THE Problem


It’s not failing to market yourself in a job interview, writing a poor cover letter that fails to grab their attention, fear of initiating a meeting with someone in the role you want or even agonizing over your career path that is the biggest problem for most people. Interestingly however, all these are tied to the fundamental one thing which holds back being successful. That one thing? Positive self-esteem.

Again and again I interact with people who question themselves, who see their abilities and skills as needing improvement. They often show their lack of self-esteem in the words they speak and write, often without even knowing that their choice of words reveals more about them then they realize. Their non-verbal communication also gives away their lack of belief in their abilities. Yes, “Believe In Yourself” is one of the best pieces of advice a person can be given. However, it’s one thing to know you should believe in yourself and quite another to actually do it.

Take the person who, upon sitting down in an interview, starts off by saying, “Oh my gosh, I’m really nervous, I’m going to try my best but…” Or the cover letter that says, “I believe I can do the job”, and not, “I know I can do the job”. Then the body language people use, often folding into themselves in trying to become invisible, or the doubt they reflect on their face as they speak, the weak handshakes, the lack of eye contact etc.

Poor or low self-esteem is robbing employer’s of great employees, and robbing people of wonderful opportunities in the workforce. It keeps people in entry-level jobs when they do get them, and can keep people from taking chances because their fear of failure outweighs their desire for success. It’s sad. It’s more than just sad actually and it’s got to change.

Now if you feel your self-esteem is low, it’s likely you’re not to blame. If you seldom got praised or supported as a child growing up – be it from parents, extended family and teachers etc., it naturally follows that these key authority figures in your early life did you a major disservice which now as an adult has you instinctively doubtful of yourself. Now as an adult, you might not believe others when they say you’re beautiful; being overly critical of minor flaws. You might not have the courage to stand up and tell your parents – even as an adult – that what you really want to do in life is ….

Here’s the good news. Just as years and years of never being complimented, encouraged and supported can do a great deal of damage to your self-esteem, the same can be said of the reverse. In other words, you can in fact improve your self-esteem. This is not something however that’s going to correct itself overnight. Just telling yourself that you’re going to believe in yourself isn’t going to undo decades of damage. Damage by the way might seem like a strong word to use, but honestly, if you’ve been put down or never even had words of encouragement from your parents and significant people in your life, they have in fact damaged you whether it was intentional or not.

Building your self-esteem and self-respect back up is something you can do however. When someone gives you a compliment, do yourself a favour and accept their assessment instead of automatically downplaying or disagreeing with their words. What someone has recognized in you as good and worthy of noting is a good thing. The choice is yours to say a simple thank you or deflect those words with your automatic, “What? This old thing?” or “I don’t see myself that way.”

The person you are now is a product of your past, and it’s equally true that the person you become in the future will be a product of both your present and your future. Yes, it takes time, but time alone won’t change things much. You really need a combination of time, surrounding yourself with positive people who recognize and voice the good in you, and a willingness on your part to be open to seeing yourself differently; a change in your attitude.

You deserve a positive future. You are worthy of the good things in life; the very things you want such as a good job, supportive and positive relationships, feeling good about who you are as a person and seeing yourself as a person of worth.

One thing you can consider is removing yourself from the constant influence of negative people; the one’s who tell you that you’ll never amount to much; that you should just settle in life and you’ll always be flawed. You’re so much better than how they see you! When these people happen to be in your family, you might consider telling them how hurtful their words are, and that they’ve got to get behind you or get out of your way. The person you’ve been is not the person you’re going to be.

Build on small successes. Sure it starts with being open to the, “Believe in Yourself” philosophy. When others say good things about you, accept that they see something in you that you yourself may not; and they just might be right, especially if you’ve heard this from others.

Self-esteem can be rebuilt and when it does, it’s a beautifully powerful thing.