Successfully Managing Stress


Whether its finding employment, paying the bills, buying a car, building a home or any number of other things, it’s only natural that you might feel highly stressed. You may look around at others you know in the same situation and see that they seem to be handling things so much better than you are and wonder why that is. In fact, this too can cause added pressure and stress; wondering why we aren’t coping better.

It’s true of course that some people do handle their stress better than others. However it’s also true that while some people seem less stressed when in public, they worry and fret more when alone. They may ‘bottle it all up’ as it were; deal with their stress internally and keep things to themselves so it seems from the outside that they are in better control of things.

Control is pretty much at the heart of experiencing stress. When we feel in control we’re better able to respond to situations that otherwise might have us feeling highly agitated. Lose that control, that ability to manage a situation and we can feel reactive and not proactive; having to deal with things beyond our control.

So if you are considering buying a home and you’ve got the money for the down payment and you’ve figured out what you can comfortably afford to pay on a monthly basis, you’re more likely to feel less stress about the purchase. However, what could be causing you to feel stress is the things you can’t control, such as a bank increasing their mortgage lending rates substantially to the point where you can no longer make those payments. That possibility – beyond your control – can keep you up nights, make thinking and worrying about your decision to buy now or not a stressful one.

The same is true when looking for employment isn’t it? Of course it is because we can’t control everything in the job search. We can’t make a company hire us any more than we can make them interview us, or create a job when there isn’t one. We can’t make them keep us instead of laying us off if they’ve come to that decision.

Yet for all this, there are many people who react differently to the same situations we get stressed about. “How?” you might wonder; “How do they do it? Why aren’t they stressed out if they are in the same situation as me!” There’s many possibilities, but I suspect it’s because while it seems to be the same situation, it’s actually not.

Two job seekers may have an upcoming interview for the same job and be out of work for the same time leading up to the interview, but where one is extremely anxious and worried, the other is not. How come? Possibly one is better prepared and more confident in their ability to come across as the best applicant. Possibly one perceives the interview as an interrogation where the other sees it as a conversation or exchange of information.

So we can see that while the situation may remain constant for two people, it is experienced differently for each person based on how they perceive it and how they respond to it.

Think about what’s stressing you now. Angling for a promotion, friction with a co-worker, mounting debt, job performance, a relationship.  What is it that you are worried about, stressed about, anxious about? Pick one and ask yourself now what level of control you have over the situation. It may be that you’re feeling stressed largely in part because you feel things are out of your hands and dependent upon others for resolving. Similarly, you might feel that things are within your control to work on but you don’t know where to start and that’s your stressor; as would be the case when trying to decide what career to follow.

Gaining control over a situation is something you just might not be equipped to do on your own. The good news is that whatever it is you are stressing over, others have been there and managed to get through. If you had a conversation with someone who could lend you guidance, share their experience and more importantly what they did to end up with a successful outcome, that might be what you need. In the end it’s going to be you personally that – one way or the other – deals with your stressors. So you can get some advice and hear how others have handled that friction with a co-worker, but in the end it’s up to you in your workplace to do something about it. The strength you gain in seeking support and guidance from someone else will however boost your confidence that a resolution is more important than allowing the friction to continue.

A very positive outcome of sharing with others what you’re stressed about is that you may get multiple strategies of dealing with things, hear a perspective that shifts your own thinking, and from all those views and suggestions you’ll find one or two that might work for you. What we see as insurmountable and massive may to someone else who stands objectively detached like a manageable problem.

Typically something we stress over gives us an opportunity to develop a skill; which when gained allows us to overcome the situation, better equipping us to handle similar situations in the future.

 

Communicating Without Saying A Word


Whether you’re unemployed and looking for a job or employed, your non-verbal body language is sending out all kinds of information to those within eyesight. What message you’re sending is entirely up to you of course; but pay no attention to ensuring the message you’re sending is the one you want to communicate and your lack of attention to this could harm you in ways you haven’t considered.

Even noticed the difference in how people move when walking? If you’re looking for a low-key but profitable way to spend your lunch hour, sit down with your lunch in a public space and people watch. Follow several passersby’s with your eyes – not just the handsome or cute ones! – and as you do so, be aware of the assumptions you’re making. When you see someone ambling along at a leisurely pace, their hands in their pockets, how do you perceive them? They don’t seem in a hurry to be anywhere.

Contrast the above with the person you see enter your view who is moving at an accelerated pace compared to others around them. They are walking briskly with one arm swinging at their side and the other clutching something that could be a document folder. Their head is up as they walk, looking for the clearest path in front of them, their eyes focused on what’s ahead of them. Again, what’s your brain communicating to you about them with little else to go on?

Did you assign a gender to either of the two examples above? Did you picture the first one with hand in their pockets to be dressed down from the second one hustling from point A to point B? Did you see the first person as enjoying the sunshine, making the most of their personal time on their lunch hour? Of the second, did you picture them still on the clock, obviously not on their lunch even though you’re on yours? Did the brisk walker seem to move with purpose while the ambling, leisurely movement of the first suggest at the moment they were in control of their time and what to do with it?

How you move says a lot to others who likewise make inferences about what you’re doing, your level of activity, the urgency or lack of it in how you’re going about things at the moment.

Now earlier I’d said jokingly that you should look at all people not just the handsome or cute ones. Think on that now though; what is it about how people dress, the way they move, the attention or lack of it that they take to their personal grooming, their facial expressions, etc., that attracts us to them? When we find ourselves drawn to someone do we sometimes also give them positive attributes and think positively about them before they’ve even uttered a word? Similarly, if we find ourselves disinterested or even negatively affected by someone on first sight, do we likewise perceive them negatively before they’ve opened their mouth to speak?

Our body language communicates much about us. We can seem dominant, defiant, submissive, reclusive, introverted, outrageously confident and non-conformist etc. In the clothes we wear, the tattoos and body piercings we may or may not have on display, the attention we put into our makeup, hairstyles, shoes on our feet etc.; everything about us communicates to others.

So all of this is important to acknowledge and understand when it comes to those times in our lives when making impressions on others is important to us. The job interview, meeting the potential in-laws, the date on Saturday night, your appearance in court, your friend’s wedding, the prom, spiritual gatherings, lounging at the golf club or yoga studio; we never stop communicating to others and all of it non-verbal.

The good news of course is that with some thought and attention, we are largely in control of the non-verbal communication we send out, hopeful that it is received by others in the way that is consistent with our intended message. Are you going for, ‘confident’, ‘professional’, ‘casually comfortable and relaxed’? Sometimes of course you may be told in advance how to dress. An invitation to a party might say that formal wear is in or the person setting up the interview over the phone might tell you that business casual is expected.

The best time to put some thought into your clothing and the image you want to communicate to others through your body language is always the same – now! When you know the kind of work you are interested in, you can safely predict with a high degree of accuracy the kind of clothing you’d like for a future interview. Now might be the best time then to get out and get that clothing together while you’re relaxed and not distracted with the pressure and stress of preparing for an actual one in a couple of days.

Be it a skirt or dress, formal suit, shirt and tie, getting things now – or at the very least budgeting now to acquire these items as you can afford them, will pay off when you go to the closet and they are there at the ready.

Remember, you’re in full control of the messages you communicate to others simply by entering their visual proximity. Best to make sure you give some thought now to how you want to be perceived.

 

No Applications? No Interviews. No Job. Simple.


The best way to get a 100% guarantee that employers will continue to reject and decline to offer you interviews is to stop applying for jobs altogether. Do this and you’ll be done with frustration, stress and the cycle of applying with hope only to taste the acrid bitterness of rejection; then to reapply again with optimism etc. Yes, give it up now and escape from voluntarily setting yourself up for ongoing disappointment.

Of course if you follow that opening advice, you’ll have a lot of time on your hands. Time that initially will seem like a wave of relief washing over you. After all, no more scouring the internet and job boards for minimum wage, entry-level jobs. No more fruitless networking meetings, resumes to tailor to specific jobs, no more need for LinkedIn; the freedom to post online whoever you are, whatever you want without a thought or care about who sees what. No more emails to send, nor the need to be checking your phone for possible invitations that never come. What a relief indeed!

The downside of course is that all this free time doesn’t exactly stop your brain from wandering back to thoughts of employment. Without a job or even looking for one, you’ve got about 7 hours a day, 35 hours a week, 140 hours a month etc. that you wouldn’t have if you were working. How many of those hours are you going to fill productively doing other things? Reading, traveling, exercising, watching television, fixing things around the home; all good in their own way, but for how long are these things going to keep bringing you the happiness they do now?

The most obvious stress for many is where does the money materialize from to allow you to keep living where you do now? There’s the rent or mortgage, food, utilities, repairs, transit, clothing, your morning jolt of caffeine. What about entertainment, unexpected expenses, illnesses, new glasses, dental visits, prescriptions, the virus protection on the laptop that needs renewing? Just a small list… So you start getting frugal if you haven’t already; thinking strategically about what you can do without; what you’re willing to sacrifice. That gets stressful after awhile doesn’t it? I mean, saying you’ll do without item B because you won’t give up item A only to find that in two month’s time your ‘must have’ item A is something you have to part with to keep item C. This is living?

Sometimes all these decisions just seem overwhelming right? Sure they do. This is when some people turn to self-medication which never really seems to have much of a lasting affect. Oh for a while they shift your thinking and provide short-term relief. In the long-run however the medications wear off and you’re back dealing with the original thoughts and you’ve added the lower self-worth and need for self-medication to your list of things to be disappointed with in yourself.

The thing about stressing while in a job search is that you’ve got one thing to hold on to that makes the frustration of a job search worth the effort; there’s the hope of success. Get into the interview stage when you’ve had a rough time even having your applications acknowledged and you’re making progress. Have a good interview or two and you feel the momentum building. Build on the momentum and you find your making the short-list; getting down to the last cuts. Get the job and all that frustration leading up to this moment suddenly becomes worthwhile. You appreciate the job more when you get it, you experience a moment of gratitude and appreciation for what it took to get you there.

All those expressions about putting in the hard work to get what you want, keeping your eyes focused on the destination or anything worth having is worth working for etc. suddenly have real meaning. You earned this one.

Gone are the days when many people got the first job they applied to or jobs just dropped into their laps without really even looking. Gone are the times when your good looks, natural charm, sexy clothing or mom could get you the job just for the asking. Well for most of us; there are still some regressive employers who still hire sexy, but think about it; do you really want to work for a person who hired you based on that? What are you setting yourself up for in the future? Get hired based on merit, job-specific and transferable skills, experience and you’re better off.

Don’t give up, give in, lose hope, listen to pessimism and grind your job search to a halt. Stick with your quest for employment and apply for jobs. Do your best to keep that positive outlook but allow yourself to be human and acknowledge the disappointment and frustration that a prolonged job search can bring. You can simultaneously be disappointed with progress but optimistic that you’ll eventually succeed.

Athletes have trainers, coaches and rely heavily on those who have previously achieved success to mentor them. Why not follow the same formula when you’re after something you ultimately want too? Seeking support while job searching, having a professional coach instruct you in how to be most effective and then having the discipline and intelligence to actually follow the advice you’re given with a commitment to your own improvement is exactly what successful people do.

Of course there’s always the alternative…

 

When The Right Job Isn’t What Others Expect


Less than two weeks ago a young woman and I introduced ourselves to each other. Unemployed and looking for work, she voluntarily accepted an invitation to join a small group with whom I would take the lead and support while they searched for jobs.

When we first met, I looked at her existing resume and got an idea of her education and experience. Turns out she has a Community Service Worker Diploma which I was happy to see. So it was surprising on that first day when she announced to everyone in the group that she was looking for a job in Retail; or just about anything.

Ah the dreaded, “Anything” had raised its ugly head once again! Why on earth I thought to myself was this bright 29 year-old woman with this kind of education, ‘settling’ for an entry-level job outside her field of study? A natural question to muse about I thought at the time and had to look into quickly. After all, if I could get some time with her one-on-one, surely she’d open up and share which, in this case, would help me better understand her motive. Was it frustration with not getting to the interview stages, getting there but not being hired, not finding jobs to apply to? So many questions!

You have to understand that what I was in danger of doing at this point with almost no information to go on was projecting my value system on to her. People do this all the time don’t they; maybe you do too? You know, because we think someone has credentials and shows such potential they should be aiming higher, going for something better; something WE think is a better option for them. Transferring our own expectations on others.

I made it a point to sit down rather quickly with her and asked a number of questions to get at what was not clear just from looking at her. Without giving too much away here publicly, she mentioned that her last position was a poor personal fit and ended up with her termination. In addition to that experience, she has overcome some personal challenges (excellent news by the way!) which being very recent has left her a little depleted on the self-confidence meter. I mean great to have overcome them, but some passage of time without these reappearing would increase her belief that they are truly in the past.

In other words, the right job for her in the present; the job that she would best be suited for and fulfill many of her needs is a job outside her fields of training. When I listened to her without projecting my own expectations on her, I understood and empathized with her in a way that gave her reassurance that she was indeed going about things in a well-thought-out way. While she didn’t need my permission to do so, (and we both realized that) she did feel better knowing I wouldn’t be attempting to push her to try for jobs she wasn’t mentally prepared to succeed in a this time.

I’m thrilled to say that this allowed the two of us to connect on a more personal level. In sharing a little and finding reassurance and support, she was more at ease, truly receptive to learning, and it transpired into her demonstrating some excellent observable behaviours. She was the first one in class each day, the first to voluntarily contribute when I posed questions to the class at large and what I’m most happy to share is that she is the first one to have secured employment!

You know what else impresses me a great deal about this woman? In her email to me just yesterday in which she shared this success, she also indicated that despite having achieved her employment goal, she plans on attending both today and tomorrow; the last two days of class because she’s learning and enjoying the experience. Isn’t this the true sign of a winner? Absolutely; and she is.  She also made me smile in that email when she mentioned that she had gone in with the reframed attitude that a job interview is really a conversation; and although it lasted an hour and a half, she and the employer had an excellent talk which ranged from the job itself to topics like the dogs they owned. She took what was shared with her and implemented it which resulted in her ultimate success.

So much to take away from her story. Of note, I’d urge you to give yourself permission to seek work that’s right for you at any given moment, even if it seems to others you’re underachieving. In her situation, this job will rebuild some self-confidence, offer some much-needed income, re-introduce her to what employers find attractive in the applicants they interview; punctuality, living up to employment expectations. She’ll improve her interpersonal skills, get a reference or two perhaps.

This is what she wants and needs now. Sure, in the future she may once more opt to pursue employment making use of her academic education. She didn’t ‘settle’ at all though did she? No, she actually identified what she was capable of and needed, then took the initiative to improve her skills and apply what she had shared with her and achieved her goal.

You have to applaud her and others like her; I know I do.

 

Thinking Of Returning To School?


If you are one of the many people who are finding that landing a job is difficult at present, one of the things you might be thinking of is returning to school to further your education. This could be just the remedy you need or a colossal waste of your time and money, resulting in kick-starting your career or leaving you saddled with debt and still with no job. Yikes! Isn’t that your biggest fear!?

Debt; four simple letters which together could find you with a poor credit rating, affecting your future ability to buy a car, a house, even land a job with some organizations. Just the thought of going to school and investing a year or more of your precious time only to have the possibility you could emerge still in the same situation with no job prospects? Why it’s enough to drive a person crazy!

Hang on a minute. Let’s look at this rationally and objectively. Take a breath; a deep one that fills your lungs and then exhale. Do it again. Better? Okay, let’s begin. Oh and I should add that I have no vested interests in any educational institution.

Supposing that as our premise, you are finding it difficult to get job interviews and when you do, you’re not getting job offers. It could be that there are too many people with the same qualifications as you, and in addition, some of your competition have added education. The decision to head on back to school and may be exactly the right decision if employers in your field place a high value on extra education, or you learn they view your education as out-of-date.

Could be that your degree from 1981 is now of questionable value, or in a field like technology where advances come often and quickly, you’re losing out to new grads. If you have been able to narrow down what course or training you’re lacking that is holding you back, then returning to the classroom to get it is wisdom my friend. Don’t even read the rest of this article; get up and go register now!

Another solid reason for more education is if you have come to a point in your life where a completely different career is in order. You’ve grown and with aging you’ve found you have new interests; interests which you’d like to pursue as a career and your current education doesn’t qualify you to compete. Same advice, quit reading and contact the College or University and get yourself registered.

There is another kind of situation you might be in which could also have you considering the classroom as an option. You might not be at all sure what kind of work you’d like to do. Returning to school would cocoon you from the world of work for 2-3 years while you pursued a degree or diploma.  Couldn’t hurt at any rate to add some letters to the end of your name, and hopefully you’d figure it out in that time.

Well it’s not up to me to say one way or the other but generally I’d say all education is worthwhile. It will add to your resume and maybe some time in a placement applying those skills could indeed spark a real interest you then pursue and life all works out beautifully. That money you owe when you graduate isn’t debt at all but rather an investment you’ve made in your mind and your future. Well done!

However, that time you spend in a classroom could actually prove harmful. If you graduate and then don’t feel inspired to look for work doing what you went back to school to learn, that money you spent might actually just be plain old debt; with you no closer to knowing what to do with your working life.

A good idea perhaps is before investing your time and money in school, interview some people doing the work you might be doing upon graduation. Pick their brain, find out what they really do and ask yourself if you’d be happy in a similar position? Ask the employers you’d be asking to hire you when you graduate if they prefer graduates from certain schools or programs. Not much point happily going to school somewhere only to graduate and then find employers don’t value what you received or the institution you got it from isn’t recognized.

One thing is for sure; don’t return to school just to hide from work. If you’re not sure what to do, spend some time working in several jobs. Invest a year – maybe two or three actually – doing a number of jobs finding out what you like and what you don’t.  You choose what goes on a future resume anyhow, so don’t fret about job hopping; you’re on a mission of discovery.

Going back to school is a wise decision which will improve the way you think, make you more competitively employable and give you an edge. However, upgrading your education and then finding out you’re eventually working in a job you could have got three years ago without your new degree might be a waste of time or just part of your education in the game of Life. Depends on your attitude and how you view things.

Best advice if you’re on the fence? Make a decision either way, and make it NOW; the stress of not deciding isn’t helpful. You’re on the clock.

“How Did You Prepare For This Interview?”


If you didn’t prepare at all, this question might just be difficult to answer if not downright impossible. Unless, “I didn’t” is an answer you feel like delivering with confidence. Be ready to have the interviewer lower their first impression of you, end the interview and suggest that in the future you do so to make the most of the opportunity and stop wasting both your time and theirs.

A job interview is a wonderful opportunity to showcase your skills, experience, education and personal suitability as it relates to a job possibility. For you as the candidate, it also represents a great opportunity to sit down face-to-face with at least one person – and perhaps more – from an organization you might be highly interested in working with, and explore in more depth if this organization is one you’d like to spend some time employed for. Why would you pass up the opportunity to do some advanced preparation?

Honestly, there are a few reasons why people fail to prepare in advance for job interviews. I suppose one could be so overly confident that the job is theirs before they even arrive that the time would seem better spent leading up to the job interview. Perhaps you’ve been told the job is yours; the interview merely a formality. If this is the case, you might just be going through the motions, but if someone other than the person you are expecting should conduct the interview, they might be surprised enough at your lack of preparation that they cannot endorse you and surprise, they go with someone else.

Also true, you might not prepare out of ignorance of how to go about preparing. When it’s your first job interview and you’re in your teens, or I suppose you’re well into your 30’s but you’ve never had a true job interview before, you may not know what to research or how to go about it. Very  similar is the person who never having had an interview at all, preparing for one isn’t even something they’ve considered, let alone know how to go about it.

Then there’s the cocky man or woman who figures, “Hey it’s me after all, they’ll be lucky to have me and my natural charm and good looks will win the job.” Oh yes, these types are still out there, and no amount of advice will change their point of view. Be they handsome, gorgeous, sexy or otherwise, they’re counting on their physical assets to give them the edge. Depending on the job and the interviewer, it might even work. Some interviewers are after all, rookies themselves.

Ah but to you. What will you answer if the interviewer should ask you what you did to prepare for the interviewer? Typically in our times you should have made an effort to check out the organization on the net. A webpage visit is an easy and convenient way to start. Look for buttons to click on like, “About Us”, “The Company”, “Contact” or, “Who we are”.

You might also want to ask of the person who invites you to an interview who the interview will be conducted by. Knowing the names of the people ahead of time and their positions gives you people to research via LinkedIn. Not only will you learn about these people, you might see their pictures and feel less intimidated by the unknown as you walk in the room. Certainly look up the organization on LinkedIn at any rate and read!

Any contacts you have at an organization interviewing you are sources to be tapped for information. Inside info of course that you’ll just not get anywhere else. What’s it really like to work there? While a job posting says what you’ll do on the job, where is most of your time spent and find out about the culture, atmosphere and the intangibles too.

You might want to take a dry run out to the site of the upcoming interview to check exactly how long it will take to get there. Maybe pop in and pick up some literature, an annual report, people watch as they come and go. You can pick up a lot of information just watching people such as their clothing styles, whether they have a spring in their step and a smile on their faces or they walk in like their dragging a ball and chain. Locate that washroom near the interview area you might use to freshen up in too.

Another key piece of preparation is a mock interview. Sitting down and going over your answers to some key questions is a good way to build confidence, find and correct any areas of concern and improve your self-confidence. Getting feedback from someone who either works there or who can give you objective feedback is well worth your time.

Do not neglect to come up with a few questions of your own. What do you personally really want to know? What’s important to you? Management style, advancement opportunities, salary and benefits, travel requirements, the chance to collaborate with others? Training incentives?

Just imagine heading in, getting comfortably seated and you realize you really do want this job. After putting you at ease with some small talk, you’re first asked to tell the interview panel a little about yourself and what you did to prepare for the interview. Will you be off to a good start?

Networking: Get The Conversations Started


Network they say; meet some people, reach out and start a conversation.

What would I talk about? How would I begin? Why would they want to talk with me? Who would I start with? How do I network? Where do I go to meet the people I should be talking to? When is the best time to get networking?

Whoa hold on a second! Good questions! In fact these are the typical questions many people ask when the subject of networking comes up. The word networking has been around for some time but even longer is the activity itself. People have done it for thousands of years – maybe you yourself – without even knowing you were. So it’s peculiar in a way that when someone says, “You should network more”, a lot of people roll their eyes, sigh the big sigh and then say they don’t really know how to network. It’s like upon hearing the word, ‘network’, they focus on the last syllable only; ‘work’.  And don’t we all just love that!

If networking is all about having conversations with people you share some common interests with, then you’d think this should be relatively easy. If for example you’re a model train enthusiast and there’s a model show coming to your community, you could plan on attending and strike up some conversations with others in attendance with your common love of trains as the subject. That doesn’t sound too difficult. They might share information you don’t know, introduce you to some new product line or better yet, introduce you to another person with whom you could start a conversation with, and voilà, your network has grown by one.

It’s important to understand that networking isn’t only about what you could get out of a conversation. True networking is also what you can add to the other person’s knowledge. In other words, while it may be obvious what you could get from the person, what have you got to offer in return? What’s in it for them to have a chat with you?

This is where many people fail to network effectively and for two reasons: 1) they don’t know what they have to offer and 2) they may not be good at what we refer to as schmoozing. Schmoozing? You know, chit-chat, hobnobbing, chatting, conversing, making small talk. Just the thought of it can give some folks anxiety and force a retreat.

Hold on though. Remember in that model train show scenario? There’s your common interest. You’ve got a ready-made topic of conversation and it’s a safe bet that striking up a talk with someone about trains will get the conversation going. You don’t need – nor should you – plan the entire conversation out ahead of time. The other person will add their own thoughts to the talk and it may go in a direction other than what you had planned ahead of time based on their interests too.

What’s good to have ahead of time is a goal for your talk. Are you wondering how you might get involved as an Exhibitor the next time the show chugs into town, are you after a hard to find caboose, looking for a job as an Event Organizer etc. Sometimes you can just come right out and be direct, get your answer and move on. Other times, you’d be better to start the dialogue, set up a relationship first, and then proceed to see if there is anything you can give to the other enthusiast. Maybe you know someone with a large collection of trains who came about theirs through an inheritance, and they want to unload them.

Once you’ve established a conversation, you will likely feel much more comfortable getting around to what you’re really after. By delaying your real motive until you’ve talked a bit, you may be surprised to find that the other person is more receptive to helping you out than they would have had you just walked up and said, “I’m looking for a job as an Event Organizer. Hiring?” Far too direct, too much all about you and your needs and there’s no real reason for the other person to feel in any way connected to you to help you out.

When it comes to moving ahead with your job search, career advancement, employment exploration and your career journey the advice is the same. It might not seem initially very productive, but having conversations with a variety of people is an excellent way to go about this process. When introducing yourself, look for the common point of interest. Check out their online profile if you don’t know them, look for causes they care about, positions they’ve held, companies they’ve worked for. Your looking for an opening; one thing you could use to get the conversation going.

When a conversation starts it may not always move the way you anticipated. There may be times you get nowhere or you could hit the jackpot and start a long-term relationship built on your opening remarks that makes a good impression on the other person. More often than not, you won’t be best friends, but you could very well help each other out, give and take information and find your relationship becomes mutually beneficial.

Don’t start your conversation with, “Hiring?” This is only about you; you’re direct but offer no reason for them to help you out. Maybe, “I see we both have a passion for trains.”