Unemployed And Feeling Bitter?


Bitterness is a personal characteristic which most people don’t find attractive in others. It’s evident in the sneer or scowl, a smirk, the tight lips set in a smile of sarcasm. Bitterness is also one of the least desired qualities for anyone in the position of choosing applicants to extend job offers to.

While you’ve every right to feel what you feel, it’s equally true that employer’s have the right to choose the applicants they feel will add rather than detract from the chemistry and culture they wish to establish and maintain in the workplace. It’s hard to imagine any organization going out of their way to hire bitter people. Would you agree?

So yes, while I acknowledge your entitlement to feel bitter if you so choose about what’s happened in your past, it seems only logical to me that if you want to impress someone enough to have them welcome you onboard, you’d best either lose the bitterness or at the very least, conceal it.

Now if I were working closely with you and found you gave off this air of bitterness, I’d point it out. Further, I’d share with you what exactly it is you’re doing that I’m observing and interpreting as signs of bitterness. For only if you’re aware of this and you’ve some awareness of what it is that sends this message to others have you the chance to do something about it if you choose to do so. This is an important thing for anyone who works with a job seeker to do. So if you should enlist the services of a professional to help you out with your job search, let me suggest you extend permission so you’ll get honest feedback. What you do with that feedback is up to you, but allowing them to share has to be on the table.

Honestly, there are some professionals who are loathe to be entirely honest with the people they work with. It’s fine of course when there’s positives to comment on, but when there’s something unattractive and personal, not everyone is comfortable sharing their observation. This becomes what people call the elephant in the room; whatever it is, well it’s big enough everyone can see it but no one wants to acknowledge and talk about it. This can be out of a fear of confrontation, fearing an argument. It can be for fear of hurting the person’s feelings, not wanting to make them feel worse than they already do.

Here’s the thing though; whatever it is – in this case observable bitterness – it’s plainly visible, it’s a job search barrier, and until it gets addressed, it remains an obstacle to getting hired.

Have you ever heard the expression, ‘one bad apple can spoil the bunch’? This nicely sums up exactly why employer’s are fairly united in steering clear of bringing any new employee into their workforce who carries overt bitterness with them. Why would they want to introduce this person with a chip on their shoulder to a group of positive and productive employees? The fear that this one person might taint one or more (maybe everyone?) is too great to risk. The chance that the whole positive group might turn this bitter person around isn’t worth it. So it is that virtually all employer’s would rather settle on the person who will come in with a positive attitude, as demonstrated by the smile on their face.

Consider however this likely truth: You’re bitter because you’re getting nowhere with your job search; no calls, no interviews – well there was that one – but it went nowhere. It’s been some time and you’re disillusioned. Your optimism departed long ago and now you’re expecting the rejection that ultimately comes. With this belief, your body language and facial expressions reflect this prevailing mood. When you meet potential employer’s, it takes a lot of energy and mental focus to keep your predetermined presumption of failure to yourself. Over the course of a 30 – 60 minute interview, while your thoughts move from question to question and coming up with answers, your focus on concealing what has become your natural bitterness slips once – maybe twice. Those visual clues are likely to get picked up and send off warning signals to the interviewer. “Something isn’t right with this applicant…intuition…the experience of having interviewed many in the past…there’s just this something I caught briefly in a look…”

While you haven’t had any previous dealings with the person interviewing you now, your pent up bitterness from past experiences is nonetheless coming out and on display. The interviewer works under one assumption every time; this is you at your best. Well, if you’re at your best and your bitterness is on display, they can only imagine what it will be like when you’re hired and working there as your, ‘normal self’. It’s likely to be magnified and worse.

If you don’t care of course and want to showcase your bitterness that’s your call. Be prepared for a lot of rejection and as a consequence you’ll have many more reasons to justify your bitterness. Entirely your call. But that’s the thing isn’t it? It’s within your control, you’re the one in charge of how you feel and you’re the one – the only one I’ll add – with the power to change how you feel and how you come across – if you so choose.

It might make you feel better to blame others but ongoing bitterness is a choice you make.

My Advice: Hold Off Job Searching


Sounds like odd advice from an Employment Counsellor to give on the surface of it doesn’t it; putting your search for a job on hold. Yet quite often, that’s the advice I give some of the people I meet with.

Now if you’re employed and see yourself first and foremost as a taxpayer and believe that everyone in receipt of social assistance should be completely investing 100% of their time looking to work, my apologies. There are some situations in which I believe looking for a job is not only ill-advised, it can set someone back tremendously from finding employment in the long haul.

Take yesterday as an example. For two weeks, I instructed a dozen people in the basics of using the computer. I’m talking basics here; using it to make an email, learning how to access the internet, find employment opportunities, make a resume, apply for work with that resume. We did more as well, but I like to instruct with practicality in mind, so as most were unemployed, why not learn the basics of the digital world and at the same time, showing them how competing for employment these days requires computer skills? Anyhow, there I was yesterday, seated with one of the participants from that class, doing a follow up appointment.

Typically, I plan on giving someone feedback on what I observed over those two weeks, encourage them and point out moments of success and accomplishment. However, I threw all that out the window yesterday when this one woman came in and we sat down in my office. She was 15 minutes late, and said she had almost decided not to come in for the scheduled meeting. Two developments on the day before our meeting occurred; she was contacted by her Doctor who said she must meet immediately with her to share results of some medical tests and her 13 year old daughter was committed to a hospital for a few days after telling her own Doctor that she was thinking about killing herself.

Suddenly, giving feedback on computer skills and talking about using these new skills to job search seemed entirely inappropriate. Of greater importance in that moment was listening, supporting and responding to her disclosure, her fears of what her Doctor knows and must share in person immediately and her own daughter’s thoughts of ending her life. At a time like this, the focus on receiving, comprehending and processing these two major life events supersedes any encouragement to get out and get a job.

Besides, if you believe that she’d be able to effectively job search at the present moment, I’d venture you’re views are based in ideology and not practical reality. Do I think governments always get this? No. I suspect when they look at stats, they focus solely on how many people start a program, how many finish and how long it takes someone to find employment after taking a program to determine its effectiveness. Numbers don’t tell the whole story; not by a long shot.

“Will I get in trouble for not looking for a job though?” she asked. So I took an hourglass from my desk and flipped it over, letting the blue sand fall. “You only have so much energy. Right now, your focus and energy is on receiving your own diagnosis and whatever implications that holds. As a caring mom who has a daughter in crisis, the two of you have a lot to work through, you’re probably blaming yourself and you’re scared. You just got two extremely upsetting events on the same day. Forget the job search for now; you won’t be in trouble.” She looked at that blue sand accumulating in the bottom half and said seeing how the top was emptying was how she felt.

Near the end of our meeting, she told me how glad she was that she’d decided to come because she’d considered staying at home. There she was, expressing gratitude to me for making her feel better. It’s pretty humbling to hear someone in the midst of heightened anxiety and trauma be so genuinely kind and thoughtful. When she left she hugged me; we hugged each other. Somewhere in that simple act, some of her fear melted into me, and some compassion for her suffering flowed from me to her.

Do you really believe she should be focusing 100% on looking for work? Do you really think I – anyone for that matter – who counsels and supports people looking for work should pressure her into making a job search her first priority? And where I now wonder does any government making funding decisions and program cut decisions factor in this kind of experience?

I tell you this, were I that woman, receiving these two pieces of information, I’d sure be grateful to meet with a compassionate, understanding and patient person. Yesterday I was fortunate to be that guy, but this is not about me. I believe there are people with equally, even better responses everywhere, having similar experiences daily.

Something as simple as removing an expectation of finding work and assuring them they won’t have their benefits suspended, can do far more good in the long run by building a trusting, human connection. For who is equipped to deal with either of these situations let alone two on the same day?

So yes, put aside the job search; there are times when it’s not priority #1.

And your thoughts?

Job Interview And Dating. They’re Related?


People in the know are always talking about preparing for job interviews and how important they are, especially when you want to get your career going, find a job or work on getting a promotion. If anyone has ever given you the advice, “Make sure you do your homework”, they’re really saying you should put some serious thought into the opportunity of meeting the employer. Although you might feel confused on what to do, I’ll bet you’re already doing it; just not in the job hunting, career or promotion context.

I’m guessing you’ve had times when you’ve headed out to meet some friends, gone to a party, a wedding, perhaps a blind or first date. What these situations have in common is they all involve meeting and interacting with people. And I think it’s safe to say that in all these situations, before you head out your front door, there’s things you think about and do.

First of all, you consider what you’re going to wear. What you choose depends on the situation, and it’s likely that what you wear to a wedding will differ from what you wear when you’re heading out with your friends for an evening at some local pub or a backyard barbeque / party. And a date? Oh you’ll put some thought into what you’ll wear because you want to do two things; look good and feel comfortable. Looking good is all about making the right impression. Hmm… same as an interview.

And it doesn’t stop with clothing. You have a shower or bath, shave and groom your hair, check your face a little bit closer than usual for anything that might mar your good looks. Apply the deodorant, maybe even dab on some baby powder if you feel you’re in danger of showing some sweat and you check yourself out again. Ah, you realize your teeth and breath need attention so you brush them, floss, swish around some mouthwash and your confidence is rising. Your ready.

As you think less about how you look and more about actually meeting this person, I bet you start thinking to yourself, “How will I introduce myself?” and, “What can I talk about?” You might come up with 2 or 3 things you hope they’ll find interesting about you and be impressed by. “Impressed by” … hmm… there’s that first impression thing again.

Now if you go along with the dating theme, you’ll want to find out about them so you have some kind of idea of who you’re meeting. It’s possible you might even ask people who know this person, “What are they like?”, “What’s their situation?” or “What do they do?” You’re gathering information aren’t you? The more you know about them, the better you’ll be prepared to say and do things you hope they’ll find attractive. You want them to like you and you don’t want get off to an awkward start by taking them to a Steakhouse, order yourself the largest cut on the menu and then find out they don’t eat meat for ethical reasons. For a first date, might have been better to go for pasta, sushi or seafood.

Okay so you’ve done some preliminary homework, asked around, maybe even went online and looked up a social media page or two. All of this is simply called research. See? You’re putting in the work ahead of time with the hope things go well. Now during the actual time together, you’re talking up your good qualities, down-playing your liabilities or if you do share a weakness, you hope it won’t end the date badly. After all, you’ve made that first impression, and you’re working on building on it; strengthening how you come across in a positive way. Hmm… there’s that, ‘making an impression’ theme again.

Okay now sooner or later you’re getting to the end. If you’re still interested in them, you hope you’ve done enough to have them interested in you too. You might ask to call them in a day or two, get a number, maybe even plan a second date. If things went well, you get a second meeting, and if not, you get a blunt, “I’m just not interested”, or even a, “I’ll be in touch” and it just doesn’t happen. Hey, they won’t always be interested in getting into a relationship with you just as you might find things about them that you don’t find attractive. The impression you’ve made and the impression they’ve given you are what’s going into the decision that you’re good for each other or it’s not going to be a good match.

By the way, if things don’t work out, it might sting tonight – even tomorrow or a few days later. Eventually however, you realize there are other people to meet and you might even be thrilled things didn’t go further when you find a better match.

Dating in this sense is much like the interview for a job. You want to make a good impression and that means doing your homework, putting effort into your presentation, talking about your good qualities you hope they’ll find attractive and of course, you’re also sizing them up too as a fit.

Whether you like the dating analogy or not personally, there are a lot of similarities. And telling people you’ll do anything work-wise is like saying, “I’ll date anyone”. Yeah, that’s never a good idea now is it?

Why Would I Want A Mock Interview?


I can just imagine many of you reading today’s blog about the benefits of a mock interview. You of whom I envision are thinking to yourselves, “I don’t like interviews, they’re so stressful! So why, when I don’t like them in the first place, would I voluntarily want to do more interviews? Especially when they aren’t even real! No thanks; interviews are painful, nerve-wracking and overall a negative experience to be avoided as much a possible. So a mock interview? No thank you!”

That’s a pretty strong reaction, but for many I’ve met over the years, it accurately sums up their feelings. They see choosing to ask for a mock interview like asking to have a root canal when there’s no need for one – just to be ready for the real thing if/when needed. Yep, a big NO.

The unfortunate reality of those who avoid the mock or practice interview is this: without practice, there’s no opportunity to get feedback and improve on their performance, so the outcome is performing poorly in the real thing. Poor interview performance of course leads to one thing; an unsuccessful outcome and having therefore to apply for more jobs and go to more interviews. Yet somehow, it seems preferable to some people to avoid all the research, practice, feedback, adjustments to delivery and just wing it. Not to sound trite but I ask you, “How’s that working out?”

Now there’s three possible outcomes you can arrive at when you typically go about interviewing by just winging it.

  • You succeed and get a job offer
  • You fail and keep on going about things the same way
  • You fail and decide to get help and improve your odds of success

It’s that first one; that belief that despite the odds, you could succeed without ever having to go through practice interviews, that keeps people from seeking out help. It’s very much like a lottery; the odds are heavily stacked against you succeeding if you interview poorly, but there is that slim chance of success and you’ll hang on to that if it means avoiding practice interviewing. The irony is that the people who avoid mock interviews are typically the ones who could benefit the most.

So what goes on in a mock interview? Let me just say to be clear here, I’m not talking about a couple of questions you give your partner or close friend to ask here. The problem with these willing and well-intentioned people taking you through the mock interview is their reluctance to point out areas to improve because of your potential negative and volatile reaction to their feedback. And if we’re honest, you’re likely to dismiss what you don’t want to hear anyhow and tell them they don’t know what they are talking about because they aren’t an expert!

If the mock interview with friends or family works for you however, great. It’s a start and who knows, they might just observe and hit on some things that turn the experience around, helping you land that job offer. If so, well done everyone!

However, if you really want to maximize your odds of success, it’s good advice to seek out the support and feedback from a professional. Employment Coaches, Employment Counsellors and others who provide job search coaching are the people you’re after here. Many of these people can be contracted with at no charge through community social service organizations. If you’ve got the desire and the funds, you can also contract with a professional privately too.

Now, some of you I’m sure are raising the argument that if you’re out of work already and funds are tight, why on earth would you lay out your money and pay someone to put you through the mock interview? The answer of course is one you instinctively know already; if it increases your odds of success and getting offered a job, that’s money well spent. But I don’t want to appear to be just writing an ad for buying services people like me provide.

So what would a mock interview look like? Well, depending on the person you’re getting help from, it could look like this:

You meet and discuss how you’ve prepared in the past. Maybe a couple of questions get tossed out just to determine what you’ve been saying to date. From these, a baseline is established. An Employment Counsellor / Job Coach will provide feedback on:

  •  First Impressions (Clothing, Body Language, Handshake, Hygiene, Posture, Tone of   Voice, Eye Contact)
  •  Answers (Quality, Length, Sticking To A Format Or Winging It, Are You Answering The Questions? Using Examples?)
  •  Suggestions For Improvement (Some Quick Improvements and Some Longer To Master)
  •  Final Impressions (Ideas On How To Wrap Up The Interview On A Positive)

Now of course this doesn’t include how to prepare for and follow up on your interviews; both of which are extremely important and both of which you’d get a lot of help with from a professional.

Interviewing methods evolve over time and how you may have succeeded in the past could no longer be working. I suppose the real question here is whether or not you are performing well enough in your job interviews to land job offers. If you’re getting a high percentage of interviews for those you apply to, and if those same interviews are resulting in job offers, you don’t need help.

If on the other hand, you seldom get interviews at all, and the ones you do get don’t result in job offers, do yourself a favour and think seriously about getting help – and that includes mock interviews and feedback.

 

 

 

 

It’s Not Enough To Want A Job With Animals


Working with unemployed or underemployed people as I do, I often hear statements like, “I’m not really a people person, I’d like a job with animals; maybe a Vet.” So many fail to understand that almost all those animals they want to work with have an owner; someone they are going to have to interview to find out what the issue is with the pet they are about to treat, and to recommend how best to keep that animal recovering so they get the best chance at getting back to their full health.

Now, I’ve no issue with listen to the musings of people as they consider various occupations. No, I actually believe this is a good thing. Listening to someone express their thoughts about what they might like to do and more importantly why they feel that way is very helpful. Listen attentively and you can really understand their motivation. However, I also find people don’t have the necessary information on a job to really decide if they are cut out for it or not. Almost inevitably, there’s been no research done into a possible career. That Vet they are thinking about becoming does a lot more than spend time scratching a hard to get itch or getting a thankful nudge of a muzzle.

When I talk about how they feel about putting an animal down or dealing with an owner who works all day and can’t take the dog out for a walk, they often tell me such people shouldn’t own dogs at all, and that they’d never be able to intentionally end an animal’s life just because the owner doesn’t want to pay for needed operations.

Now at the other end of the spectrum are those that want to work with people but don’t know how. “I want to help people” is how some of these first conversations start. What kind of people? Helping the wealthy invest their money and watch it grow? Blasting out natural terrain to build roads or pipelines that will carry oil? That would help many people. “No! No! No!” Not that kind of help!” You see, helping people can be done in a lot of ways? So what do the people look like that you want to help?

One key thing needed by both groups of people; those that want jobs working with people and those that want jobs with as little people interaction as possible, well, its education. Not the kind of education you can get in front of a computer monitor but the kind you can only get when you’re receiving formal in-person instruction.

This is typically where a barrier comes up; sometimes derailing an entire dream. “I can’t go to school.” When asked why, often those who want to avoid interaction with people at all costs will cite their discomfort or anxiety at having to be around others. Those that enjoy other people cite the debt they’d rack up. Nope, schooling is out. Well, you would think that the goal would change to something that didn’t need formal education. Sadly, it often doesn’t. 10 years will pass and that person will still tell people they meet that they’d like to be a Vet. They still won’t invest in formal education, but somehow they are holding on to that notion of being a Vet.

There are other occupations however that don’t involve years of education, excessive debt and will still meet the desired goal of working with animals or helping people. However, somehow the people involved have to first become aware of these occupations and then they have to understand the scope of what those occupations do on a daily basis. When this happens, possibilities surface and forward progress can take place.

A Dogwalker for example often visits a home when owners are out and spends their time in the company of the animals they love. It’s not a bad way to stay in shape yourself by the way as you’re out exercising more than just the dog. Independent work for sure; maybe not rich, but then again that was never a stated goal. Productive, helping, less people contact and yes, some income. A little interaction with owners of course, notes explaining how the animal behaved, collecting payment etc. Pretty minimal stuff most of the time.

But be warned. When you are talking to others, do more than say you just want to work with animals if you expect them to really help you discover your dream job. Case in point; see what you think of this job posting:

Wanted

Hiring 10 people to work with animals. $16.00 per hour plus bonuses. Overtime available. Job requires kneeling, bending and standing for extended periods. No education required, no previous experience needed. Will train on the job. So how does that sound? Interested? Great! You can start immediately as well, which is always a good thing. The job? Catching and killing chickens.

Oh it’s a real job – but when you said you wanted a job with animals you weren’t specific. You say you don’t want to kill animals and that you figured this was obvious? Maybe it was obvious to you but you didn’t say that. Good to know. We’ve just learned you don’t just want a job with animals, you want a job with animals where you don’t kill them. Our search is narrowing down.

 

Out Of Work? Get Your Team Together


I think it’s a behaviour common to many people; when we’re embarrassed, ashamed or we feel we don’t quite measure up in some way, we do our best to isolate ourselves and keep the source of our embarrassment to ourselves. After all, the fewer people who see us in these moments, the less likely we’ll feel exposed and we hope to reintegrate ourselves back into our circle of friends and family when we’ve recovered.

Being out of work can feel very much like this scenario. Lose your job and you might tell a few of your closest supporters, adding, “Please don’t tell anyone. I don’t want everyone to know.”

The irony of this behaviour is that we often miss opportunities because the very people who could tell us about job openings are kept unaware that we’re looking for a job. As you’re unaware that they know there’s a job opening, you don’t even know what you’re missing; but you’ve missed it all the same.

It’s our ego though that needs protecting; and I don’t mean this is in a self-centered kind of way. Protecting our ego, how we view and see ourselves, is a natural response. The fewer people who know about our unemployment the better; and if they want to assume we are still employed but on some vacation or leave, that’s fine. We’d rather they don’t even know we’re off in the first place. And this is the problem. We don’t want to have to explain why we’re not at work, so what we often do is stay inside our apartments, condo’s and houses; going out only to gather food and necessities.

Like I said, this behaviour is natural and instinctive. So having stated this, let me suggest you consider doing something which on the surface goes against your natural instincts; get your support team together.

Your support team isn’t just made up of Employment Coaches and Resume Writers. It isn’t made up exclusively by your spouse or your best friend either. No, your support team is composed of people you can trust to help you out while you look to regain employment. Just like many other teams you’ll be apart of in life in your personal and professional life, team members have specific roles.

Here’s some of the people you might want to enlist to be a part of your team:

  1. You

You’ll need to be the CEO or lead of your job search team. As you’re going to be recruiting people to help you out, you’ll need to prove that you’re seriously invested in this project. It will mean reaching out to people, getting them on board, checking in with them to make sure they stay committed – and they’ll work more for you if they see you working hardest for yourself. You need to be accountable therefore; show up for meetings, do your homework and work hard at finding work.

2. Emotional Supporters

Before we get to the technical helpers, you need people who will empathize with you, care for your well-being and understand the highs and lows of the job search. You’re going to have bad days precisely because you’re human. Emotional Supporters are those who get that and love you anyway. These folks pick you up and pick up the tab here and there when there is one. They keep you included in get-togethers and find the ‘free stuff’ to do is important to staying connected.

3. Technical Support

You’d be well-advised to have some expertise on your team when it comes to resume writing, employer and employment research. A good proofreader, a sounding board or Employment Coach to offer the critique you need but in a supportive and understanding approach. Whoever you have in this area might be your mock interviewer, helping you find and keep the confidence to do your best in those up and coming interviews.

4. Partners and Family

Obviously if you’re single and have no family you can pass on this one. However, when you have a partner, your spouse, boy/girl friend, etc. is critical to providing you with the stability you need when the assurance and identity a job brings is missing. Sure you might not want to, ‘burden’ them with your news and hold out telling them above all others, but your partner is a partner for a reason. It’s not your job that they value most – it’s you. If you want to deepen your relationship, trust them when you’re at a low point with being out of work. This is when partnerships often work best; you pick each other up and move forward together.

As for the family? Sure you might not want to tell mom or dad to protect them from worrying and protect yourself from all the dramatics of their concern; but that concern is genuine. You might end up with a few lasagna dinners being dropped off or depending on their status, a job lead to follow-up. Some moms and dads are really good at stepping up even when their kids are in their 40’s!

Now there are others too, but I leave it to you to decide who you need on your job search team. Essentially what I’m saying is go the counter-intuitive way and reach out to people instead of shutting out people. Take care of your physical and mental health while you find yourself out of work. This unemployment won’t last forever and will pass.

Fresh Starts Happen When You Want Them


Okay so the calendar today reads December 10 and New Year’s Day is still a few weeks away. Typically the days leading up to a flip in the calendar are when most people think of making some major changes and starting fresh. Be it losing weight, changing a bad habit, getting a job, or any number of other goals, January 1st seems to be a day when the majority set out to put their new behaviours into action.

However, when you think about making some changes, think about that line, “there’s no better time than the present.” I suppose the reason that right now is the best time is simply because it’s now that you’re thinking of whatever you want to change so take the opportunity to get on that change while you see the value in going after your goal. If you put off making that decision until some point in the future, you might not feel the same compulsion later. So what are to do? Wait another year until another January 1 comes along?

As for needing some external stimulus for change – like flipping the calendar to a new year, there’s plenty of those moments. For starters, we all flip the calendar 12 times a year; that’s 12 times we could opt to start some new behaviour. There’s your birthday too, although that comes around once a year, you might just be motivated to change things up on this anniversary of your birth.

The thing about your birthday is that it’s very much like New Year’s Day in that it only comes around once a year. If you’d like more opportunities, consider that there are 365 days in a year, and every day you wake up could be the sign to hit the reset button on something you want to give up or something you want to start.

Now suppose it’s a new job you’re after. Whether with the same employer you work with now or a new one, a new job might be just what you want. If you plan on getting hired January 1st, 2019, you can’t put off applying for jobs until December 31 can you? No, of course not. You’d actually need to be doing an active job search now; researching, job applications, resume and cover lettering writing, interviews and networking meetings. Even so, how many employer’s are even open on New Year’s day and of those who are, how many are training the new person on January 1? Not many.

Of course, you might be telling yourself that January 1st is when you’re planning on starting the job search. Nothing wrong with that goal. Of course, between now and January 1st you may be missing some good job postings, and it would be a shame if the job you’d really love has a deadline that you miss when you’re kicking back waiting for the calendar to roll over. The people you’re competing with will thank you for that one!

Let me give you a small piece of warning and advice if I may. When you make the decision to change your present behaviour and start to seriously job search, it’s going to be a challenge to first make the change in behaviour and then sustain that momentum you start. Your body and mind are going to rebel and in both cases because the status quo is easier.

So if you have a job already, the extra work you have to put in outside of work hours with a job search might come across at times as too much extra pressure and extra work. If you’re unemployed you won’t have that problem, but when you’re out of work, the habits you’ve developed – possibly sleeping in late, having a nap mid-afternoon, watching too much television or playing video games etc., might get in the way of sticking with the job of finding a job.

So be ready for the kick-back; that want to fight change and just go on with things the way they are. It might take some real perseverance and stamina to sustain change. What will help is keeping your mind focused on why you started the change in the first place. In other words, if your goal has enough meaning to you, it’s easier to stay focused on it because you want it bad enough to fight past the barriers that stand in your way.

It’s when you don’t want something enough to fully commit to it that you’re likely to fail. So in other words, if other people keep telling you to get a job and you grudgingly agree to start looking for one, the chances of success are lower as you’re more likely to revert to your old habits when no one is looking. When YOU want to work more than you don’t, that’s when your odds on succeeding will rise. It’s not just about getting a job by the way, the same is true of any goal we talk about; changing eating habits, learning to drive, being more polite, expressing more gratitude, taking up a new hobby. Whatever you’re contemplating, it will come about sooner if you commit to it.

Finally, if you’ve been after your goal in the past and not had success; so you haven’t got interviews or job offers, think about going about your job search in a different way. Trying a new strategy may get you different – and better results.